Vulnerability is the new black

{Source: Rosie Hardy on Flickr}

I’m in the midst of reading Daring Greatly by Brene Brown.

If you haven’t read it.
Run {do not walk} – and get yourself a copy.

It’s true I’m a fan-girl of everything the woman writes.
But truth be told, though I’ve read all of her books – none of them resonated with me as deeply as this one.

The buzz word lately, amongst my circle {and in many “personal growth” circles}, is vulnerability.
Vulnerability is the new black.

So what IS vulnerability?
The bland text book definition is:
VULNERABILITY
: capable of being physically or emotionally wounded
: open to attack or damage

I much prefer Brene’s interpretation of vulnerability.
In Daring Greatly, she talks about a Theodore Roosevelt speech, “Citizenship in a Republic”, also commonly known as “The Man in the Arena” speech. It was delivered at the Sorbonne in Paris France way back in 1910.
Yet the truth of his powerful words still rings true today.

“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better.
The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again,
because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause;
who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly . . .”

That my friends. Is vulnerability.

In my world, vulnerability looks like . . .
: being the 1st one in a relationship to say, I love you
: daring to bare my soul on this blog
: publicly declaring that I want to direct my own film
: asking for financial help when the going gets tough
: breaking up with a friend
: doing the “ugly cry” in front of others

You might be able to relate to some of these real-life examples of vulnerability.
And I’m sure you could add many more to the list.
The thing is, we ALL experience vulnerability – and most of us experience it many times, in a single day.
Our society, the world at large, has taught most of us that being vulnerable means you’re weak.
The myth is that if we do everything perfectly, if we ARE perfect, that we won’t be susceptible to vulnerability.

*insert obnoxious horn sound here*

The truth is none of us are immune.
Vulnerability, uncertainty and being emotionally bare are not optional.
The only choice you DO have is to engage. Or not.
You can sit on the sidelines and watch the big game happen. You can judge, throw out unsolicited advice and your 2-cents on it.
Or you can jump in the game. Show up and dare to be seen. Dare to play full out.

Courage = being vulnerable.
Vulnerability = daring greatly.

For more on this topic, I recommend checking out this 20-minute TED Talk by Brene {circa 2010}, on the power of vulnerability.
I think I’ve posted this video before. But it’s worth re-posting {many times more}.

So, I’d love to know, what are your thoughts on vulnerability? How do you engage {or not engage} with it every day? Have you consciously tried to be more vulnerable in your life?
If you’re like me, leaving a comment below is Step 1 in being vulnerable. By opening up and sharing, you give all of us reading the permission to open up and share as well.

Thank you for being here.
Thank you for being YOU.

xo

 

P.S. And seriously, go buy this book. ASAP. It will rock your world.